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Sunday, June 29, 2008

The Gift

Thursday night, I came home from the hospital per Mom’s request, totally spent, tired, and in every way gave out. I said goodbye to hubby and kids earlier that day, as they left for Colorado to see great grandparents. I’ve gone out of town with the kids before and left hubby home, but I don’t think that I’ve ever been the one left home.

When I made it home, I marched straight to the tub, nothing sounded better than a long, hot soak. With wrinkled fingers and toes, I put on my favorite pjs and gathered dirty clothes to take to the laundry room. When I opened the door to drop clothes in the laundry basket, I found it completely empty. There was not 1 sock, towel or anything. I stood there for a while just staring. I then looked over to the folding table for stacks of clothes to put away, there was nothing. I proceeded to the sink, there were no dirty dishes not even a fork or spoon, looked in the dishwasher, it was empty.

As I went from room to room, I slowly began to realize the incredible gift my husband gave me. I walked outside and stood in our perfectly kept yard. I saw beautiful plants and flowers blooming in the flower bed. In the backyard, the pool was impeccable with crystal clear water. As I came back inside, sat on our bed and covered up with the beautiful new comforter he bought last week, I saw pictures of Baby Girl and Little Man on my nightstand. What picture perfect happy children they are!

Just a few weeks ago (seem like months), my husband let me pass off my responsibilities as wife and mother to turn, take Mom’s hand, and walk with her through the treatment of this ugly disease called cancer. As I described before, he kept the house and yard in perfect condition but also voluntarily took on double duty with the kids. I know that at times I’m a control freak, but until now I had no clue just how overbearing I am. I honestly believed that no one could love and take care of our children like me. So I never gave anyone, not even him, a chance. With me gone, you wouldn’t believe the amazing bond that has formed between he and the kids.

When Baby Girl was at Grandma’s, Daddy and Little Man had marathon movie nights and fierce video game battles. They went on long rides together on the Razor (looks like a sporty golf cart, drives like a 4-wheeler). Little Man said that he saw a hawk, turtle, cow, and deer on their drives. Daddy took both kids plus 1 (Little Man’s Best Friend) to several movies and played in the pool both day and night. In his care, they didn’t even get one sunburn, starve, or lack for anything. While Baby Girl was at neighbor friend’s house (one of the fabulous Who Ha Sisters), Who Ha Sis asked Baby Girl if Mom had sewed the flag patch on her skirt? Baby Girl responded, “No, Daddy did. Daddy can fix anything!”

He took care of the house, was there for the kids, but also for me in a moment’s notice. When I called one rainy morning for him to help Dad and I take Mom to the doctor at one of her sickest points, he was there. When I called him from the ER because the doctors could not get one of the medicines to control the spasms, my husband dropped everything, ran to Mom’s house, and was at the hospital in minutes with the needed medicine. Late Sunday night before Mom started feeling better, I texted my husband, “ Mom needs flowers, big arrangement. Will u please order and have delivered tomorrow.” He responded within minutes, “I’ll take care of it. Love you.” He was at the hospital with the most beautiful, big flower arrangement in different shades of purple (her favorite color) first thing Monday morning.

The Who Ha Sisters relieved me so that I could go home, shower, grab a few minutes shut eye, and maybe see my kids and husband. It’s something to be so totally spent that you just don’t have anything left for your family. He not once complained only offered support saying, “You can do this.” And when the kids would get upset because I had to leave, he would give me a knowing look, distract them, so I could make my getaway. Not all my requests did he understand but was there just the same.

He’s such an incredible husband and this gift he’s given me is priceless. I can’t put into words the need I had to walk through this with Mom but it felt as crucial as my next breath. He saw and understood my need and made the way so I could make the journey with Mom.

Thank you love, for this precious gift, I will treasure it and you forever!

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